A Modest Proposal

Hey hair,

I'm still 23 and the law of nature postulates that you are supposed to still strongly rooted in my hair scalp. You are supposed to grow vigorously, as thick as you like, as long as you wish, and I think I've created a good environment for you to do that, have I ever colored you with red or yellow? Didn't I wash and nourish you everyday?  To act and behave like this given all that I've invested in you and at a time where I still highly dependent on you to attract my female counterparts is an epic act of betrayal!!

I've collected a picture of you from my 19th birthday in 2006 to the most recent 2010, and your lack of commitment and dedication to me are evident. To say you're getting thinner at an alarming rate is an understatement, the rate is astronomical, and I urge you, no, I command you to pull yourself together and grow!! Let's do it. Together, we are unlimited...

April 2006 - Look at all the fun we had, thick and dark, everyone looked at us with envy

April 2007 - Have you concocted your diabolical series of betrayal yet at this time? Would never imagine that 2007 is my last birthday with still a perfectly fine hair volume.

April 2008 - First sign was seen. I was getting worried, shower time was terrifying, but I was still faithful that you were going to come back to your senses

April 2009 - Did you still expect me to smile at this stage? The signs were conspicuous, people started to notice, I started to count "how many, how many?"

April 2010 - And finally. Oh, concerning, deeply concerning. 

So, my dear hair, please tell me when you're going to put an end to all these. I hope you will behave just like all your other peers, at least until the next 20 years. Could you? If not, please let me know, I'm gonna have to find a place to do hair implant soon. Thanks.